Round 2
Most of the things I have in my life, whether material or not, I have manifested. I only realized this when I took a second to stop focusing on what I don’t have and honing in on my blessings. Everything from clear skin to the body I want, to my website, my husband, my babies, my house; my everything really. So in times of doubt, anxiety or paranoia, that is really all I have to remind myself of. And the simple fact that God has got me, always.
In June I will become a mother of 2. I found out I was pregnant on October 10th and since then I’ve remained calm and collected, for the most part. Having had a pretty dramatic miscarriage in April of 2017, before getting pregnant with Maya, the nerves were there but I didn’t let them consume me; in normal Evan fashion. I will delve further into that experience in my book; It’s its own chapter.
Both of my children were planned. I consciously got off of birth control, tracked my ovulation, did the deed, and boom: babies. For some, it is easy, for others it is not and I believe there is no right or wrong way to do it. You will never get an argument out of me on the topic. It is no one's place, man nor woman to tell and individual or a couple how they should or shouldn’t conceive. Do you.
The first 12-13 weeks of pregnancy can...completely suck.
It’s often ridden with anxiety, accompanied by nausea, exhaustion and a slew of other symptoms that vary woman to woman. Now that I’m in my 13th week, I’m curious how this pregnancy will progress, but I am more optimistic than anything else.
10 weeks into my pregnancy, I took a simple blood test to determine the likelihood of the baby developing genetic diseases. The same test gives you the option to find out the gender. Admittedly, Anis and I were both hoping to have a son as our second (and last) child; imagining how different that journey would be. As each day passes our excitement grows thinking about Maya and our new, HEALTHY baby girl becoming the best of friends and neither one ever knowing life without one another.
Now that I am a mother, my confidence and perspective this time around have matured just as I have. In addition, my husband and I have grown within our partnership and as individuals and are equipped to handle the unpredictable.
It will be a ride, and I probably have no idea what I’m getting myself into having two young children so close in age. But this is my life and I love it.